Relationship & Marriage Counseling
(Please note that because of timeliness of this issue I am interrupting my series on “Having a Good Fight” and will resume that after the blogs that were written for this series)
A Marriage Counselor’s Treatment of Andrew Weiner (candidate for Mayor of New York City) and his marriage?
By now you may of heard that Andrew Weiner, candidate for Mayor of New York City has been caught repeatedly “Sexting” a number of young woman. I thought folks might be interested in a Marriage Counselor’s point of view in regard to treatment for the issue of “Sexting” which could also apply to pornography as well as infidelity issues.
Let’s start off with the fact that “Sexting” is one of technology’s ways of creating an opportunity for infidelity. It is a behavior of betrayal in a committed relationship. I say that this is an act of infidelity in that there is a sexual connection with another (in Andrew Weiner’s case) woman that is both inappropriate and degrading to his wife.
If the Weiner’s came to me for help with their marriage, here’s how I would counsel them.
First I would want to find out how committed Mr. Weiner was to staying in the relationship and if he was, it would be important for Mr. Weiner to show deep remorse for what he has done over a period of time.
Both in counseling and in the relationship itself it would have to be understood that time would be an important factor in healing from the infidelity; time for his wife to deal with her hurt, anger and shame. Often times I have seen couples in counseling that the offending person has promised to do whatever it takes when they are first discovered and over time the unfaithful partner has difficulty sticking to that commitment.
In my next blogs I will give three practical steps that the Weiner’s should be taking. These steps are important for any couple who has suffered from the trauma of infidelity.
For more details about how to survive infidelity you can read my two manuals about how to “Heal from the Trauma of Infidelity” (one for the betrayed partner and for the unfaithful partner)