A Marriage Counselor’s Advice – “If Beyonce split and Gwyneth Paltrow are both Single: What Are The Odds of Not Being Cheated On Next Time?”  (Part II)

As a relationship / Marriage Counselor here are my four pieces of advice to these rich and famous women (and for the rest of us folks as well):

 1. Take it slow – If you let yourself get swept up in the whirlwind activity that can follow a life like yours, it’s hard to tell what’s really going on between you and your partner.  Relationships often start with passion.  In the beginning of a relationship is like being addicted, both people are obsessed with each other and can’t wait to see them.  Personally, I love that part, but as time and certainly after marriage things get into a pattern, the question is:  Now that I am married “Do I like the pattern?”

2.  If I was to work with these two women in couples counseling, I would help them to realize that having a good time with someone does not equal having a good life with them.  Having fun with someone is very compelling, but the real test is going through hard times.  (see #3 for more on this)

3. How well do the two of you resolve conflict?  Is there discussion, compromise, and a realization that the issues usually are not as important as the relationship?

4. Is there transparency / openness?  We all need our privacy but the more we know about what our partner is doing and where they are, the less chance there is for “bad” things to  happen.

Marriage Counseling and Couples Counseling can go a long way to preventing these “bad” things from happening.

There is form of counseling called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)  During CBT counseling the counselor would help them think about what could be done to prevent being with an unfaithful partner and being a victim of infidelity again.

Why do affairs happen?

How do I forgive, or should I?

How can I prevent this from happening again?

What does it take for a relationship to be strong?

But for now the above four items are a starting point of advice about how to prevent infidelity to these two women.  By the way, these issues really apply to all of us even if we’re not Beyonce or Gwyneth. 

Marriage Counseling and Couples

Counseling really can Help

Remember you can always go to the home page and “Ask Dr. Marty” a question.  Dr. Marty’s answer is free.