Do couples have to agree about all, most, or some issues to have a good relationship?

If you haven’t already, I want to invite you to subscribe to my free newsletter “Keeping the Spark”. This entry is taken from my 5th issue of “Keeping the Spark”.  It’s amazing how many times couples run into issues that they can’t solve.  In therapy there isn’t a week that goes by that folks don’t get struck as to what to do when they can’t reach agreement.  This short entry will answer the important question “What do we do next, when we can’t agree?”

We know that most problematic issues (69% – see Dr. John Gottman’s research) do not get solved, they get managed.  Successful couples “agree to disagree, with out prejudice.

Happy couples are respectful of differences and realize that there way is not the only way.  The real issue is folks can disagree in an agreeable way. In other words, it’s not the final decision; it’s how the process goes. Respectful tolerance goes a long way

Agree to disagree in an agreeable way.

In my next entry I will talk about a very interesting book “The Man Who lied to his computer.  The author raises a number of fascinating points about the value of the interaction between our computers and ourselves.  Also what we can learn about people from computers.  This review will give you some information about the book and I think will encourage you to take a look at “Man’s Best Friend or Worst Enemy”- his compute

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