Emotional Goals in Relationships

This material is taken from my most recent book   “The Essential Guide to a Lasting Marriage published by Alpha press.

Strong relationships have “emotional goals”.  Below are four emotional goals that good relationships have, you may want to develop your own that specifically fit your relationship.

1. Partners look for ways to nurture each other every day.

Small things can make or break a relationship.  Consistency and regularity are also important, not to get swept away with doing daily tasks at the expense of having a close relationship.


2. Partners time in their own head to appreciate your partner.  It is easy to see things that are upsetting and deal with set backs that happen in every relationship,  we need to remind ourselves, on a regular basis, of reasons to be grateful about being with our partner


3. Individuals find ways to pleasantly surprise their partner.  Spending time each week to think about how we can do something nice that is unexpected.  It doesn’t have to be something big, it does have to be something thoughtful, that is what you did or got for your partner shows thought on your part.


4. Partners look at their “intimate life” on a regular basis.

Asking  questions like:

A. “Do I feel both physically and emotionally satisfied with my partner?

B. Do I think that my partner is satisfied as well?

To often sexual connection is an after thought and in fact that closeness is lost or very disappointing.  It is not absolutely necessary that couples have a good sex life, but it sure helps when there is one and it adds risk to the strength of the relationship when there isn’t one.

Above are examples of “emotional goals” that couples can have.

 Love takes thought and effort. Like an emotional bank account – We can only withdraw based on what we deposit

Let me know what you think.

Dr. Marty



Call Now