How to Effectively Move Forward in Both Therapy and in Your Relationship. (Part II)
In this blog I will talk about two things you can do to grow or maintain a successful relationship as well as move forward in therapy.
- Keep a journal. In this journal write down :
- Difficult situations you are encountering in your relationship.
- Up setting / angering thoughts you have.
- Read, watch, or listen to experts in the field on a regular basis and think about what you are learning from them and keep that in your journal as well.
Shameless self promotion:
My current four books are:
* The Essential Guide to A Lasting Relationship
* The Relationship Rescue Manual
* Healing From the Trauma of Infidelity (A guide
for the unfaithful partner)
* Negotiation Handbook for Couples – From conflict
I am going to be recommending that folks either listen or read a chapter a day and apply what they are learning in counseling and report back about how their efforts have worked out.
During my counseling I ask clients to fill out a form which asks: “Rate on a scale of one to five how hard you have worked on the relationship since our last meeting. (My next blog will have a copy of this form which I call my “Therapy Update” form.)
It is amazing to me how many people either leave that space blank or rate them selves a one, on a scale of a one to five (“1” being I’ve done very little to help the relationship move forward – “5” being I’ve done a great deal of work.) It is important for folks to be reminded that with relationships, like everything else in life, the harder we work the better are our chances of success.
I want to end this blog with you asking yourself whether your relationship is a terrific one or in need of help, how hard have you worked on your relationship?
Please let me know how you rate yourself on that measure and together we can get a good picture of your chances of having a successful relationship.
In my last blog in this series, I will share with you my therapy update form and you can see how well you are doing with your specific situation.