Negotiation Handbook for Couples:   From conflict to connection  (part 1 of 3 part series)

I wanted to share with you excerpts from my book “Negotiation Handbook for Couples: From conflict to connection

Emotional issues involved in negotiation

Negotiation is about emotional issues as much as it is about getting the things you want. For example: Where you live or how you allocate your finances is not as important as whether you are happy with your partner in your home and that you don’t feel like you are being treated like a child when it comes to how money is spent.


What people really need

First of all, people do not want to feel like they have been made a fool of; next people need to feel respected, accepted, loved and valued; lastly, people don’t want to feel controlled.  You can give somebody everything they ask for but if they don’t feel cared about and loved or empowered, they will not be satisfied with outcome.

Emotional payment is an important currency of exchange.  One example of this is “face-saving.”   Always look for a way for your partner (or anyone else with whom you are having a dispute) to save face.

In my next entry I will share an example of what is meant by relating to the emotional issues of negation.

Call Now