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Couples Therapy/Marriage Advice

I’m Lonely in My Marriage (Part I)

As a marriage counselor, one of the complaints I hear often is: “I’m lonely in my marriage”. This statement is both sad and frightening.  It’s sad to think that someone who is married feels so disconnected from their partner that they feel lonely. The statement is frightening, because it may mean that the other partner might have “checked out” of the relationship.  “Checking out” of a relationship makes it more likely that a couple is moving toward a partner having an affair or at least an emotional affair.  It may also be a sign that as the one person is lonely, so is the other person and the relationship is moving closer toward a breakup.


Loss of emotional closeness

Some of the “reasons” that I hear as a couple’s counselor that a relationship is moving apart are: “We have to earn a living; the children take our time, emotional and addiction problems.  The deeper question is: “Why does a couple that once couldn’t get enough of each other; or at least wanted to spend a lot of time with each other, now are not finding a way to deal with these issues as couple and as result are lonely.  There is also often a loss of sexual intimacy.

In the next blog I will discuss being lonely in a relationship and sexual intimacy.

YourMarriageCounselor.com – has couples and marriage counselors in the following  areas in New Jersey of: ChesterFlorhamParkSomersetNew Brunswick,   Upper Montclair,  Paramus, Voorhees Chevy Chase, MD.  –

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