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Love is Something We Have To Earn


I believe that love is amongst the most powerful healing forces, as well as, an important key to happiness.  Here’s the catch about love, it has to be earned.  Below, I’m going to suggest six things that folks have to do to earn love:

  1. You have to reach out to the person you want to get love from, even though sometimes you may not want to.
  2. You have to work at understanding their point of view when you have an argument. That doesn’t mean that you have to agree with them, it means that they have to feel that you respect their way of seeing the issue
  3. Even if you get your way in a situation, you have to go out of your way, to make sure that the other person feels cared about.
  4. During the day you should think about why you love that person. Develop movies in your head about the things that are loveable about them.
  5. You have to work at being able to forgive them.  That doesn’t mean they can do anything they want, you should have boundaries so you are not a door mat.
  6.  If the person has done something that offends you at some point, after the initial angry response, the focus should be on finding a solution not on blame.

Note of exception to the above rules:

Unfaithfulness or violence of one person to another is in a different category and there are very different rules about the right thing to do in those circumstances.  I will address that in later blogs.


It’s easy to love someone when everything is going wonderfully; the real test of love, is going through the tough times together


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